Category Archives: Making choices that work for YOU

How did you love the pregnant you?

My intent in writing the Loving the Pregnant You book and blog is to provide ideas and inspiration to expectant moms by sharing the experiences of the women who’ve gone before them. I think it’s highly valuable to be able to be a fly on the wall of other people’s pregnancies, without any advice giving, to…

Even though we now choose something different, it doesn’t mean our first choice was “wrong”

After the birth of her first child, Denise felt great about her choices, and, simultaneously, she wondered what else was possible. Her first birth experience was great. She had what she’d call a “regular” hospital delivery. She went with the standard protocols her doctor’s practice prescribed. It didn’t feel uncomfortable in the moment and upon…

Want to change how you feel? Then change how you’re thinking.

When some aspect of pregnancy is not going the way we’d like, often what comes to our attention first is a feeling – a feeling that we don’t enjoy. We start to feel anxious, conflicted, fearful, unsettled, or some other way that doesn’t feel good. When we notice these unwanted feelings, we can then consider:…

Learning we’re not in control

There are lessons pregnancy can provide in learning that we’re not in control. This was a major area of cynicism and concern for me before my first pregnancy. The loss of control I envisioned I’d experience nearly kept me from motherhood. I couldn’t imagine going into a pregnancy where I would most likely lose control…

Expanding your capacity as a mom

When Margaret was pregnant with her third child, her mantra was, “I’ll figure it out.” She remembered when she thought it was going to be impossible to get herself and her two kids out the door prior to 10:00am. Then she figured it out. Sometimes she was even in the car with the two kids…

No one knows what it’s like to be the pregnant you

Unfortunately, no one knows what it’s like to be you, the pregnant you, in this moment. Even those who have experienced many pregnancies don’t know. (In fact, I’ve heard it said that the more data points we have, the less we actually know.) What this means is that it rests on your shoulders to let…

Choosing your care providers

There are increasingly more options out there for those of us who want to intentionally choose the type of people who will support us during our pregnancy and childbirth. The initial options that come to mind include a doctor, a midwife, a doula, and a birth partner. And, there are other practitioners you may choose…

Self-Care: What’s the best thing you did for yourself during pregnancy?

We all hear it: It’s important to take good care of ourselves during pregnancy. And, too often, us women, who are used to taking care of everyone else, don’t do the best job with self-care. There are many forms self-care can take from carefully selecting the care professionals who are most aligned with our perspectives to making…

No “should”ing on yourself

I think it’s pretty easy to put the pressure on ourselves during pregnancy. Based on what we think and what others tell us, we often tell ourselves that we “should” engage in certain activities, “should” think in certain ways, “should” experience certain emotions…. in essence, that we “should” be a picture perfect pregnant person in…

Remember you’ve never done this before

Remember that you’ve never done this before. Even if you’ve been pregnant before, you’ve never experienced this pregnancy before. Aspects may be different and you may feel differently. You are not always going to know how you want to address concerns that come up or what would best serve you in a situation. You may…