It can be easy to look to others for affirmation and obsessively wonder if others think you’ve made the “right” choices. If you could set aside their opinions (or what you think are their opinions), how would you want to think and feel about your pregnancy? How would you choose to BE during your pregnancy? Would you be steadfastly dedicated to your health and well-being? Would you be mindful of the balance in your life? Would you focus on unapologetically and powerfully asking for what you need? Would you want to be creative and resourceful? Would you do your best to openly share your experience and honor your value of authenticity? Or would you gently allow yourself to messily step into the “unknown”? Perhaps something else. Perhaps a combination of the above.
It’s powerful to declare this for yourself. To determine what your focus is, what values you want to exemplify, and/or what adjectives you want to use to describe yourself. When you distinguish this for yourself, it is quite empowering. You can then understand that you are choosing and not simply reacting to others and external circumstances. Simply said, you’re able to respond in situations instead of react. You can respond with awareness and purpose, rather than react due to defensiveness or confusion.
Monique was a freelance writer when she got pregnant with her first baby. She hadn’t expected to get pregnant so soon and found herself a little off-balance at the start. She felt a little lost and not entirely sure about how she wanted to adjust to this new chapter in her life. She paused and asked herself about what was most important and what she ideally wanted.
She decided that – if she could arrange this – she’d want her pregnancy to be a time of creativity and following her instincts. She wanted to intentionally honor this journey of creating life. She most wished to be creative, intentional, and at the whim of her intuition.
Monique was lucky to be in a situation in which she could pick and choose the freelance projects she wanted to take on. She could cut way back on her work, if she wanted. So, Monique gave herself permission to do just that. She only agreed to work on projects with flexible due dates or that seemed especially appealing to her. On a day-to-day basis she asked herself what she felt inspired to do. She tried things she never tried before…like pottery-making classes, she spent hours in her local museums, she wrote just for fun, she wrote letters to her baby, and she redecorated a good portion of her house. She did things that she immediately knew she’d want to do. And, she engaged in activities that she had never previously considered, like that pottery-making class that she happened to see advertized on a bookstore’s bulletin board.
As Monique looked back on her pregnancy, she could see that once she distinguished how she wanted to be during her pregnancy, she no longer felt lost and uncertain. Instead, she felt grounded and excited to see where this journey would take her. It was – and is – a time that Monique felt so blessed to be able to create and experience.
