As you begin to look forward to your pregnancy, I encourage you to expect the best. Do uncomfortable, unwanted things happen during women’s pregnancies? Certainly. Yet, if we focus on those uncomfortable and unwanted potential aspects of the experience, that is what we will attract.
Expect the best and even when the unexpected or undesirable shows up, expect the best in those circumstances. Easier said than done? Yes, many times. A trick is to focus on the big picture end result. What’s the end result you want? A happy baby that you love more than you ever could imagine? That’s the end game we’re playing for and we can get real upset when we don’t get pregnant as soon as we want or when we’re not sleeping as well as we want. We’ve got a lot of blessing in our lives. Focus on those.
My husband and I tentatively decided in the fall of 2005 that we wanted to have a baby. I say tentatively – because it had been a bit of a roller coaster ride. We told ourselves and some close friends that we were going to start trying – go off the birth control pill – in August. August came around, I freaked out and said No, not yet. Well that drummed up some conversations and some feelings for us and I saw that I really did want to go for it. I didn’t feel ready and I didn’t know how I could get there – other than getting there! So, in September, we started trying.
I didn’t get my period for a number of months. Late that year I went to my Doctor to see about inducing my period. My Doctor did some tests to rule out some common and easy to test for reasons why I might not be conceiving. I passed all the tests. She started talking to me about the 5 pills to induce my period and then 5 fertility pills and then I’d come in on the 21st day to see whether I had ovulated. There were some other dates and numbers she had mentioned, but I had glazed over. I said something like, “We’re having a good time just trying and not knowing exactly when I’m ovulating and I’m not sure I want to get into counting.” My doctor looked pleased. She said, that’s great. We can do that. Let’s just prescribe you the pills to induce your period. Great, I like that approach.
I felt good, I felt like I had taken charge. I was responsible and saw the Doctor and didn’t immediately fall into her initially prescribed path. (Not that there’s anything wrong with her initially prescribed path – just that it didn’t feel good to me.) I paid attention to my thoughts and feelings in the moment and did what felt good. And, remember, we can make choices for now. We’re not choosing forever. I could always go back and take the journey she had described. It was still an option. I hadn’t said no to it forever.
So, I took the pills to induce my period for a couple months in a row. Then, I started wondering and feeling uncertain. How did I know that I was ovulating in between? How did I know that my body wouldn’t create its own period a few days later? I decided to not induce the period after the next month to see what would happen. In early February I got my period on my own! And, the best thing to realize was how excited I was. I was delighted that my body was working and generating a cycle on its own. This was my first emotional sign that I was indeed ready and excited to have a baby. This experience was invaluable to me! I didn’t have another period within the next 4 weeks or even the next 8 weeks – because I was pregnant! My body only needed to kick into gear by itself for one cycle. I was ready. And if my body was ready, I took that to mean that I – emotionally and mentally – must be ready! TI may not have meant that at all, but we’re constantly making stuff up, so I might as well make up something that empowers me!
Please join the conversation: What are you making up that empowers you? How do you choose to think and feel about seemingly challenging situations?
